This is a blog all just for me. It has no purpose whatsoever except for me to share some of the random nonsense I happen to be thinking about in my day-to-day life. Sometimes it sure is nice not to have a purpose.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Keeping it All in Perspective

I have been doing a lot of reading about child development and parenting since I want to do the best job possible in raising my son. At the same time, I find it morbidly amusing when I stop to think about myself and the parents of other young kids that I see. Here we are worrying about trying to help develop our children's communication skills, motor skills, and every other type of skill. We want our children to do "process art" so that we don't squash their creativity. We try to feed them organic, unprocessed food, and we try to make sure that nothing they touch may be made out of the wrong type of plastic.

Meanwhile, in another decade, our little children will be in the throes of their teen years, and this makes me think of my co-worker who once made the following profound statement about when her now-grown children were teenagers: "I just hoped that they would stay alive."

Obviously, I do not think that my efforts to provide a safe and nurturing environment for my son are a waste. I honestly hope that the foundation that my husband and I lay now will help prepare our son to make wise decisions as he grows up. All the same, I'm also realistic and know that sometimes despite the best efforts of parents, children will still make bad decisions and sometimes luck will not fall on their side.

So, all the more, I cherish the days with my Wittle One that I have now. I love that I get to hold him close and get to protect him in many ways that I know I will not be able to as he grows older. Because, while I may sometimes wonder about when he will talk more or when he will learn to use the potty or when he will be able to sleep soundly through the night, I know that these worries are so small in comparison to what the future holds. I embrace these worries, because I know someday my worries could be about when he starts to face peer pressure over drugs or when he becomes dangerously infatuated with his "first love" or when he feels so alienated he resorts to destructive behaviors.

I hope that my worries will never be so big, and yet I know there is no guaranteed way to protect one's child from everything in the world. The older I get, the more I realize that all human beings are really so vulnerably flawed. All I can hope for is to minimize the amount of flaws that I directly cause in my children, and so I do continue on in my parenting research and I constantly remind myself to appreciate all the innocent moments I get enjoy with my still little Wittle One.


  1. We believe and think similarly. We teach all our children what we can about what we know. We learned as children what worked for us and what didn't. We experienced what our parents did for us, and now as parents can pick and choose from the big marble jar of experience our parents graciously passed down to us. Now, when the time comes and when the situation arises, may it be peer pressure, the feeling of social neglect, or bad behavior, we just hope our children pause for a minute and use their marbles.

  2. Adrian--I love your line on hoping our kids "use their marbles." Your family is one that Bill and I have looked at as a good model for us!